Kidney stone pain aside, things have been getting better. I've started to notice my thinking has started changing too. For a while I was looking at babies and wishing I was holding Lily, and although I still wish with everything in me that I was holding her, I've been thinking more along the lines of "That baby is a blessing, I hope you realise that" lately. Also I met a 17 year old girl with the name Lily, and it made me wonder what Lily would have looked like at that age.
Obviously I'm still building myself back up on the inside as I can't handle as much stress. There's been a couple of times at work when the anxiety has started to come back, and I've been able to keep it at bay, but it's not easy. It still takes a good half an hour to an hour to really calm down fully. Not nice at all, but it has been getting better. I'm still not good at taking things easy...
It's hard to believe a little over two months ago I held Lily in my arms. It was such an amazing feeling, and the memory of my finger in her hand still makes me smile, and always will. We know the time we had with her was a gift.
Today I'm thankful for: The time we got to spend with Lily... and pain relief for the kidney stone =)
No comments:
Post a Comment